Life n death... maybe juz death

Today, i decided to look into something closer to my heart, more of a fear actually.....
Death is a veri scary thing... When i was a small kid at 8, i remember realising that one day, my parents will have to die n i was sad like shit. I cannot imagine wat life would be without my parents then, n till now i also cannot imagine it. I was praying that my parents will live till 100 yrs old, so i can die together with them. That was a crazy thought as a kid but now that i am much older ( not as mature though ), i know that my parents would onli want me to live a better life when they die than for me to lead a sorrowful life. I guess death is not a scary thing afterall. It's the beforemath n aftermath of death that is really scary...

Why do i say that? Becos dying can take many forms, in terms of sickness, accidents, sorrow or even murder... In fact i can think of many ways to die, but pls do not follow any one of them. * One of the ways to die is for someone to stab u to death with a knife, after 20 stabs i can ensure that u are most likely dead. But u know wats worse? Getting stabbed to death by satay sticks, i think u need a few hundred pokes before u will die. wahahah! Sick right? well not too bad lah considering i haven got to the toothpicks. Gross right? ) I think one of the worse ways to die is by sickness, namely cancer, aids n etc. The pain we have to go though would be crazy, n god knows how much money we have to spend n how long we got to suffer till we finally die. I for one, hope to die in my sleep. Peacefully, i can leave this world n hopefully i can go to somewhere better in my afterlife. I suppose everyone would prefer my way of dying; painless n stress-free to my children... Thats the way to go, no puns intented ;)

Now i will get to the aftermath of our death, u see when we die, it's onli the end for us. But can u imagine how people that know, love n care for us feel? Terrible would be an understatement.... Death is juz a like a piece of rock dropping into a pool of water, it will cause many ripples at impact point. Lives will never be the same for those that have direct connections to it. If u have enemies, then they will be damn happy lah but if u have loved ones, they will damn sad. Time may lessen the pain but it will never take it away.... I dun know when i will die but i hope that i can be like a candle, that i will burn brightly n bring warmth to everyone's heart before i go. And i hope they will remember me for all the good times we had together n not when my death anniversery is. I hope my children will climb the highest mountain n throw my ashes down towards earth as i can finally be one with mother earth again. So dear friends, enjoy my accompany as much as i enjoy urs becos i won't know when it will be my last day on earth. So keep breathing n kicking till my next blog..........